Saturday, August 6, 2011
2 months.. What started with a single crack is now a bone with gap halfway through the bone. Haish.. Kalau sebelummni, i have problems that involves emotion more than physical, i could easily overcome it with physical activity. With problems i have emotionally, add with this problems of which i still spending time to adapt with this situation .things are gonna get really tough
with one hand. I have to admit its hard . But the hardest part of it is having to do it all alone. Ive already overcome the problem of toilet related. I could sleep but never in the position i like. I could wear clothes but never the ones i desire. Mmg lg 2 bln la merase pkai long sleeve and sweater. Sjuk nk wt cmane.. Thn je la. Makan jgn cite la. Mmg kne pkai tgn or just a spoon. Xde istilah fork and knife or spoons and forks. Itu aku x kesah sgt .
Tp yg btol btol aku dot dot dot siket bile die involve study. Aku kne habiskn sem ni mcmni. Means aku kne jwb exam in this condition. Cne nk pgg pembaris snd draw a one simple straight line?? Aku pn tatau lg. and until sem ni abes, aku xbleh nk bwk byk buku pg kls. Nk tye lecture soalan pn kne balek bilek tgk buku bru bleh tye esknye. Krtas terbang terbang nk pg kjar balek pn nmpak mcm hape je.. Knapela waktu tmpoh belaja aku yg paling crucial dlm hidup aku kne cmni.
When im writing this im not asking for sympathy. Just hoping for solution for this coming 2 month. Aku just nk satu care yg membolehkan aku jalani hidup tanpa stress .
Somebody already made my heart this miserable like hell. I cant show it with my expression. but i think a smile would just cover it instead of healing it. And the cure for that is only time. And some catalyst to speed up the process.such as a physical activity,, skating specificaly . Damn i miss it. And now i have double the problem. Everytime bgn pagi i would think of how im gonna survive this hard time...
But above all. Im just grateful to still be alive. Trust me, you can never know the true value of life until you look at death upclose. Me? I escaped it three times. And this is my third. How many more till lesson learnt. Bknnye aku nk menagih simpati tulis mnde mnde cmni. Tp just tht i need motivations. Self motivation so far is really hard. Just by writing this i can find myself a way to keep my motivations high enough. Stkt ni umi je yg bg motivasi. Thankyou. I love you